


day ten

by julek



Series: Winterfest 2020 [10]
Category: Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Headaches & Migraines, Hurt Jaskier | Dandelion, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mentions of Suicidal Thoughts, References to Depression, drug mention, numb
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-11
Updated: 2020-12-11
Packaged: 2021-03-10 17:47:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 734
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28001145
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/julek/pseuds/julek
Summary: Jaskier's got a migraine, Geralt helps how he can.
Relationships: Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion
Series: Winterfest 2020 [10]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2041318
Comments: 8
Kudos: 123





	day ten

**Author's Note:**

> Re the tags: There are descriptions of a migraine, Jaskier discusses being depressed and having suicidal thoughts.

Jaskier feels numb for a glorious second, as he presses the frozen towel against his nape. Then, the dull ache that has buried its claws at the base of his skull and his temples returns with full force, and he suppresses a whimper. 

“Hey,” he hears Geralt whisper, somewhere in the dark room. “I’m here.”

His footfalls are silent as he approaches the bed and gently sits down next to Jaskier, who’s sprawled on top of the covers, face down. He’s wearing sweatpants and a cotton shirt, the only kind of clothing he can bear in this state, and his hair is a tousled mess, wet from splashing his head with cold water.

“How’s it feel?”

“Like hell.”

Jaskier’s migraines are torturous. He’s lived with them for a while now, has seen more doctors than he can probably name and has gone on every drug there is — they’re relentless. The pain pierces through his skull every time he tries to move, tugs at his shoulders and makes his jaw ache with furious intensity. 

Geralt sheds his wintercoat —it’d probably been snowing all day, though Jaskier’s barely left their room at all— and gently places a hand on Jaskier’s lower back.

“What can I do?” he says, his voice soft.

Jaskier looks at him from over his shoulder, and his chest seizes with emotion. He feels guilty that Geralt left work early, as soon as he saw Jaskier’s text, but he’s overcome with sudden joy that he doesn’t have to go through it alone. 

“Lay with me?”

“Want me to pull out the covers? You’ll be more comfortable,” he offers. Jaskier gives him a weak nod and sits up with considerable effort, then lies back down against the sheets. He presses the towel against his forehead now, as Geralt pulls the blankets around them. He lies next to Jaskier, their shoulders touching, but makes no move to wrap around him — he’s been around for many episodes, and understands how sensitive Jaskier feels, how any sudden move or sound can only sharpen his pain.

Slowly, Jaskier seeks his body, laying his head against Geralt’s chest.

“I hate this so much,” he says, and shakes his head in frustration as a sob cuts him off. “I do everything I can. I take my pills and exercise and never drink anymore, and—”

He’s crying hard, and he knows he’s soaking Geralt’s shirt, who’s silently rubbing soothing circles against his back. 

“I’m so _tired_ ,” he chokes out, “so frustrated and so fucking _depressed_ , I can’t even,” he hiccups, then snorts, because it’s absurd how fucking wrecked he feels. “I can’t even turn on the lights without feeling like my head’s gonna explode.”

He cries some more, even though he knows it’ll only make the pain worse. There’s nothing else for it.

“And there’s so much I wanna _do_ ,” he whimpers, furious. “So much I wanna do with you and my friends, and so many projects I wanna try out, but I feel so depressed I can’t even stand.”

Geralt hums, and Jaskier’s so sorry he’s got to put him through his misery too, but right now all he can do is cry into his chest, and Geralt _knows_. He knows and he’s there for him every time, doing everything he can to help with his pain.

“And I know it’ll pass, eventually,” he sniffles, and it’s weird how he feels liberated even as the pounding never stops. “But sometimes I feel like— like it would be so much easier to just… stop.”

But the thought makes him feel so sad, he sobs even harder. 

“And I never would,” he says through the tears. “I never would, because I love my life, and I love you, but— it’s too much sometimes.”

“I know,” Geralt whispers, gently wiping away Jaskier’s tears. “I know.”

Jaskier lays his head back down. His face feels stretched out from all the crying, and he knows his eyes will be swollen and puffy tomorrow. He knows he’ll feel better, too. Geralt will sleep with him and he’ll hopefully wake up with a clear head — they’ll make breakfast together, and eat in the balcony even though it’ll be freezing outside, and Roach will sit on his lap and he’ll scratch her ears and give her a treat, and he’ll be okay. 

Maybe it’ll turn out alright, and maybe it won’t. He has to believe that it will.

**Author's Note:**

> follow this series on [tumblr](http://julek.tumblr.com/tagged/winter%20prompts)!


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